It isn't that often that I question where I come from or my parents decision to have me in this country over their native country. But listening to certain close-minded people has caused me to open those flood gates of thoughts. I was joining my coworkers at lunch in the teachers lounge. As we were talking, I heard someone say "These Mexican kids..." I immediately stopped what I was doing and started eavesdropping. Shame on me, I know, but I can't help it. The next thing I hear is "Those kids are always speaking in Spanish. Anytime they start, I shut them up and say 'What country are we in? Speaking English! We are in America, we speak English in America". SERIOUSLY!?!?! I'm sorry, I know that this is America, and that main language spoken is English. But what about the Filipinos, the Asians, Germans, Russians, Hindus, and all the other races that are represented in our country whose native language is NOT English.

I understand that if people are going to come to this country they should learn to speak what is the common language, English. But people that come from other countries that want to make sure their son/daughter doesn't lose all of their native background, like me, is probably going to be asked to remember their native language. Growing up, my parents had a rule, "No English at home, only Spanish". Guess what happened the first time I came home talking to my mom in English? I got slapped. Never again did I speak English at home. I knew that it was against the rules. But I also knew why it was a rule, because my mom wanted to make sure that I learned for sure our native language while learning the "native language" of America. I was born here, but my parents are Mexican (now U.S. citizens). I have always been thankful for that slap, because it enabled me to understand how important it is to maintain your culture and background in you, and not lose it. So many people come to this country looking for a better life. If we all conformed and lost our native background customs and culture, we wouldn't be the "Melting Pot" that America is known for.

So why so much hostility over someone talking their native language? I don't get it and I probably never will. And what's sad is that growing up, I never had to face teachers saying that to me or putting me down because of my culture or racial background. And it seems that so many teachers do that to students here at this school. And I hate it. How can these kids feel like they are actually a part of something when they are made to stand out? I don't understand it, I just don't!!! When I hear these teachers talking like this, it makes me feel like I don't belong, and again I was born and raised here. It's moments like these that I actually wish my parents had just had me in Mexico. Who cares about the opportunities that exists here? I'd rather be among loving and peaceful people over hateful ones....just saying.

This generation....

Sometimes I wonder if I should just give up in this battle or if I should find my way to victory. That's my question every day with students that come in and talk back, don't bring supplies, don't participate, dress clothes that just isn't right for their age, and so on. I don't understand this generation. It makes me feel old when I say that, but it truly is a constant battle. My parents would say this constantly as I was growing up, they still do, but it's now about this generation of teenagers.I guess every generation is questioned in the same way, we just neglect to see it because we feel our parents had different expectations than the parents of teenagers today. But have the expectations truly changed?

I worry so much about my 21 month old and her future. As a teacher, I see so many things through my students that I pray my child will not have to experience. There are so many things I pray will not take hold of my daughter later on in life. But one thing I do know, I have high expectations for her. I expect her to be responsible, respectful, take care of her stuff and be on top of things at all times. I expect her to be able to tell when someone might be using her and when someone is truly loving her. But will my expectations be enough. I can only hope that my expectations are stronger than my wants for her, and that she'll be able to recognize that as she grows every year.

I think what many of my students lack, unfortunately, is a parent to show them how much they are loved, and to encourage them instead of bringing them down. Just today, I had a student come in and say "My mom is not paying for summer school because I told my dad she had been talking to another man for the past couple of weeks. She's taking everything away and making me responsible for my 7 year old sister". Really! You punish your kid for calling you out on your sinful ways. Instead of commending your kid for recognizing what is wrong, you're going to treat him like he's nothing because you didn't get to have your fun?!?!?! How can this parent call themselves a parent!!! I felt so bad for this kid. If I could, I would have offered to pay for his summer school, kept his sister, and let him work on furthering his education...but I can't.

So it is all about this generation? Are the kids at fault for everything that is going wrong in the generation we question constantly?  I don't think so. Have their parents forgotten that they should have expectations? Probably. There are actually a few parents, more than you'd think, that still hold their child accountable for their actions. However, more often than not, adults have forgotten their own expectations for themselves, which in turn has caused them to forget that their child needs them as well.

It's unfortunately that in this day, more parents depend on technology and entertainment to be the parent. I pray every day that technology will NOT be the parent to my child! Has my child learned how to unlock my smartphone? Yes. Do I have games downloaded on my smartphone to keep her busy? No. Do I think it's wrong that parents have games on their smartphones, iphones, ipads? No. Should they be used as the primary form of entertainment for kids? No. But that's a whole other topic for another day. I'm simply saying that communication between my 21 month old is more important to me than her staying busy so she's not in my way. The communication that I build between my child and I will enable me in the future to encourage her. We will have open lines of communication between the two of us so that I can express my concerns to her about her life without it just being a one-sided relationship. My expectations will be made known in a loving way, and I will have expectations, and she will know about them. And I will enable my child to somehow see that she doesn't have to be a part of that generation that everyone frowns upon. On the other hand she, as so many kids today that don't realize it, will have the power to change that generation. Am I being naive by believing this is how it will be in the future with my daughter? Perhaps. But that's what I expect in our relationship. Having that knowledge will enable me to work on that, so that she will know that that's what I desire for her and in turn she can do it with her child. Again, it's all about expectations....at least that's how I feel.

What do you think is causing the changes that we see in this generation of teenagers? Is it the kids? Parents? Lack of parenting? Society? They all go hand in hand, but what weighs in on it the most?